Parent/teacher conference time is always an interesting time in our household. My son is an amazing kid. (Ah...don't I sound like a typical Mom!) He's very academically inclined and super competitive, so doing well in school comes pretty naturally for him and his smart peers keep him pushing himself to do well. He's actually verbally gifted, reading (several/many) grade levels ahead of where he should be. But his brains make him a bit challenging. He thinks he's an adult and, as such, he has a tendency to speak to some adults as if they were his peers - i.e. in a condescending, smart alec kind of a way.
Needless to say, we often have our first conversation with his teacher each year not at the P/T conference in November, but by the second week of October. This year was no exception. HOWEVER, this year, it was handled differently. Being a 3rd grader now, his time of free passes and stupid behavioral charts is over. Thank goodness. We promptly put an action plan in place, one that would be structured and organized and would have HIM, not a chart, accountable for his behavior, whether it be disruptive or silly or rude. After we laid out the plan, we talked to him about it, as did his counselor at the school.
It's been about a month and, with 2 exceptions, he's come home and told us he had good days. He let us know the 2 issues he had, one of which was very minor - and he was so proud of his good days - as were we. But, of course, he's 8 - so we took this all with a grain of salt.
So today, when we went in to talk to his teacher and counselor, we were pleased to say that his reports were generally pretty accurate. Both his counselor and teacher see a marked improvement. They both indicated that he is very VERY motivated to improve his behavior, and recognizes that that is where he has room to put forth good effort and grow.
Throw in the straight As PLUS and A+ and I am one proud Mom.
That whole conversation was one of those that reminded me that, as much as I think of G as my "baby", so to speak, he's no baby. He is his own person, with his own motivations and his own personality and his own strengths and weaknesses. I can help him to work through his challenges but I can't force him to do a damn thing. He needs to want it and work at it. And I need to encourage it and model the same behavior.
It also reminded me that how I act, what I do, and who I am - he's always watching and learning from me.
This parenting thing - it sure as hell isn't easy. At least not to me it isn't. But moments like these certainly make it rewarding and underscore why it truly is worth it, no matter how hard it can be.
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