selfishness not permitted

One of the things I find most difficult about being a Mom is that there are few occasions where selfishness is really ok. This is hard - not because I'm a selfish person (I don't think I am), but because parenting is a 24/7 job, and sometimes, it is a challenge to balance with the rest of your life.

G woke up this morning with a sore throat. Ok. Cold coming on. He seemed a bit sluggish but otherwise ok - he asked me to pick him up "late" tonight so he could play longer at aftercare. I didn't plan to do that, though, figuring there was a good chance he'd be wiped out if he was coming down with something.

Of course, around 1pm I am contacted by the school - but not a sick call. It's a "Mrs XXXX, can we talk today about G's behavior." email. Oh I love those calls and emails.

It seems - and I already knew this and have been addressing it - my book junkie child is having major difficulties extricating himself from his books when free reading time is over (and free reading time is on and off during the day). We talked about this the other day in the car on the way to school when G said "MOM, it's not faaaaaaaaaaaair. Mrs. R won't let me READ! Reading isn't naughty behavior. Hitting people is bad and I don't hit anymore. I don't get it. I'm reading!! Isn't that a good thing."

Queue challenging parenting moment #40954 music.

"Yes, G. Reading is great! I am SO proud of how much you read and how well you read." "Thanks Mom - I'm going to beat Mrs. R's record and get past R!" "I know honey. But listen. It's not the reading that's naughty. It's the fact that you don't stop when she asks you, that you're reading still when you should be doing something else, that's naughty." "I don't get it, Mom. I'm not doing anything BAD. I'm READING!"

Repeat conversation the x number of times it can be repeated in the time it takes to get to school...sigh....

In any event, after discussing this exact issue with his teacher for 10 minutes, whereby we concluded I will keep talking to him, she will keep talking to him, and he'll keep the daily schedule of the classroom on his desk for quick reference, she let me know:

- He got a red today for this. She said he was free reading after all 4 sections of a test (they are doing assessment tests this week) and all 4 times she had to ask him multiple times to STOP reading. She then pointed out that this caused him to miss the instructions for the subsequent section of the test. "This would have been an effective deterrent but it didn't matter - he got the entire test right. Of course." His teacher has the little stinker's number too. Who said raising a smart kid was EASY!?!?!?

- He felt like crap in the afternoon.

Fabulous. So when I did get to pick him up, he was his weepy, I don't feel good self. This was confirmed by the 101 on the thermometer when we got home. Poor little dude. Thankfully a HUGE dinner (geez he eats more than I do!) and a shot of Motrin did the trick, and he enjoyed his evening of BBQ Pit Masters on TLC. LOL.

I love that kid. Problem is? I haven't had social plans in a WHILE. Gregg's schedule is so damn busy. Guess when I have plans? Tomorrow night. Oh yeah. And I just took on the role of chairperson on a big committee at work that chooses peer award winners. Our kick-off meeting for the first quarter winners? Tomorrow.

SIGH. I toe the line closely on this one. I'm not mad at my kid for being sick. I don't want him to be sick, poor little guy! My frustrations aren't directed at him - they are directed at the situation and the timing. 2010 is off to a sucktastic start - I need the breather.

Oh well. We'll see. He seemed fine when we went to bed - with him, one never ever knows. If not, well, I want to stay home and juggle my work schedule and make sure he rests. I'll make new plans.

This motherhood thing. I am in envy of women who find it simple. It challenges me - every.single.day.